Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Everyday Value

Mercedes SL or Porsche 911 or Aston Martin Vantage?

Let’s get right to the conclusion – the Fans CAN’T go wrong with any of these three cars.

But if your Pap had to rank them…

It’s a frick’in ASTON! That name alone is worth the first $2,000 of your monthly lease payment. Then there’s the exhaust note – it’s aural ecstacy. And there’s the lustful, seductive styling…[if you experience premature ejaculation and/or have difficulty with staying power, please keep distance from the car!] As for exclusivity, about 1/10 of these are sold each year in the U.S. compared with the SL or 911.

The SL is in it’s own class. It’s really no competitor to any other car than itself in different iterations – SL550, SL600, SL63 or SL65. It’s a car for a certain set – I’ve got some money; I don’t need a flashy car like a Bentley, Aston or Rolls; I want a car that I can safely tool around in on a daily basis with easy replaceability should I crash it. This car is so comfortable in its own skin. It tries to be nothing more than an SL and is envious of no one. SL drivers enjoy easy living, from senior-citizen options like the self-closing trunk to the massive amounts of power matched to an automatic transmission. SL drivers don’t want to do too much, yet reap all the benefits of motoring well. And the car doesn’t disappoint either!

There are great exotic sports cars out there, and then there’s the 911 – the working man’s “cheapie but goodie.” Precision, purity, perfect. Problem is 2/3 of all 911s sold in L.A. have tiptronic…that’s Porsche vernacular for automatic transmission. I don’t care how good that automatic is, it’s an automatic…on a sports frick’in car! Yes L.A. traffic is bad. I understand there’s a lot of stop and go traffic. But still, don’t get a 911 in automatic…you have the S-Class as the daily commuter. Your 911 is for weekend jaunts to the Montecito home. To me, 2/3 tiptronic sales mean POSERS!

And Why?
If Beverly Hills had a Costco, they’d sell SLs and 911s in a 2-pack.

[2-pack SL550 or 911, your choice – one for you; one for your mistress. $200,000. coupon valid July 17 – August 3, 2008.]

There are just too many SLs and 911s in L.A.’s better neighborhoods. They are the Miatas of the well-heeled. And in L.A., well-heeled a-many there are. Half of all SLs sold worldwide are in Southern California! – that’s quite disturbing if you want exclusivity. But SL drivers aren’t all about exclusivity. They like telling their friends how much they enjoy their SL…”it’s a great car, you should pick one up too.” The 911 is no better in terms of exclusivity despite what Porsche salespeople will tell you. 911s and SLs enjoy the same yearly sales volune. The situation with the 911 is grimmer when you see local dealerships stocking 911s with automatic transmission and wood steering wheel – assisted-living features are par for the course on the SL, but inappropriate in a pure-bred sports car. As for the Aston, if should find one with wood steering wheel (you won’t), what the hell…it’s English.

So what it comes down to is simple – In L.A. where rich is never rich enough and thin is never thin enough, don’t fly commerical with the SL or 911 – go private with the Aston.

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